IT's not always presentient

Hark ye all seekers of IT’s wisdom and listen to this true story I will recount for you. Once upon a time the great mage Yourstruly was called upon by the voice from above to provide a prepaid calling card system within three days. Yourstruly hearkened to the wisdom of the great Scott engineer of the mythical Enterprise and asked for leeway. Give me two weeks he said and I will give you the contraption, but the great voice from above was suddenly in a meeting with the presence from beyond. Yourstruly spend two days conjuring, brought a load down from the stars for assistance, and a day stomping the bugs and presented his work, and the voice from above was silenced and the presence from beyond was once more withdrawn into the Grey nether lands.

And time went by and the company entered the prepaid calling card fray, and it was grossing big but taking losses in the battle with other feudal lords, even though Yourstruly warned the voice from above that they were selling the cards below cost. But this is another story, in our story an ugly daemon wrecks the works. The daemon mysqld (d for daemon) was suddenly overwrought with errors, and decided to stop serving the contraption’s queries. Yourstruly was rudely awakened by the standby guards in the middle of the night and brought to the dungeon whereupon he quenched the daemon mysqld and cajoled and forced him back to servitude.

The day after he was summoned to a full inquisition in the absence of the voice from above. The inquisitors demanded to know why the contraption stopped functioning. Yourstruly presented his conversation with the daemon and his success to rebind him. Alas the inquisition was not happy, why they asked did you not foresee this are you not presentient as some claim? And Yourstrully rememberred the zen masters and their calm, and calmly answered: The limits of my presentience, that is the limits I can predict failures,errors and downright daemon pevishness are the limits of my imagination. The error I faced I had not known possible, therefore I could not create protective spells against it. Upon hearing these words the inquisition was perplexed, they had not grokked the words imagination and error control spells. They slithered and rolled into a single body and mumbled and spoke in hushed voices and came to a decision. They unrolled each into their subjective corporeal bodies and summarily dismissed the mage warning him to increase his presentient abilities or else…

Entities
IT: I.T.
Yourstruly: Yours truly!
Inquisition: The management team, all of it.
The voice from above: IT’s director bringing orders from the presence from beyond.
The presence from beyond: The cthuhu like presence of the company’s CEO.
The great Scot engineer: Scotty of Star Trek whose wise words are the mainstay of all engineers “If it will take an hour ask for a day, it makes it sound more difficult and you overworked, and the captain will demand half the time anyways, and you never know, things might really go bad.”
The mythical enterprise: The star trek Enterprise but also any human enterprise for gainfull employment that works smoothly.
The contraption: The prepaid calling card service.
The dungeon: The office environment. At the time it did look like a dungeon, we were working on stools much like convicts.
The stars: The asterisk open source PBX.

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2 thoughts on “IT's not always presentient

  1. onliner says:

    (continued)….and yay the Inquisition summoned the Greater spirit of Fire and the (Delphi) Oracle to banish all evil that exists within the Corporate Monster.. alas it has failed miserably to predict the unforeseen …Our warrior, Yourstruly, rides towards the sunset with a grin …

  2. dark5un says:

    … I guess Gandalf was out of the office …

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